


Follow the Lifestream

by angelinaestrella



Category: Fear the Walking Dead (TV), The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, F/M, Fluff, Lemon, Masturbation, Multi, NSFW, Oral, Other, Sex, Smut, Song fic, Will add more tags as I go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-10
Updated: 2016-12-20
Packaged: 2018-09-07 13:49:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8803267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelinaestrella/pseuds/angelinaestrella
Summary: “Things change. And friends leave. Life doesn't stop for anybody.” ― Stephen ChboskyVarious/Readersong fic





	1. Super Rich Kids-Negan P1

**Author's Note:**

> Song: Super Rich Kids by Frank Ocean  
> Warnings: NSFW, Negan masturbation

  
  


_ Start my day up on the roof _

 

Negan woke as the sun began to rise. The room was alit with a blue tinged light from the morning sun, he stood up in bed. Naked again. He always woke up this way. The man stood, grabbing a long robe, it was an expensive silk, something he would not have had before the apocalypse. He chuckled to himself, thinking how the horror show called Earth wasn’t actually too bad. 

 

_ There’s nothing like this type of view _

 

Negan walked to the open window, admiring the sunrise. Some things never changed. He turned around, sighing before plopping on his couch. HIs eyes wandered to the girl occupying his bed for that night, Amber. She was hopeless to him. Too obedient, he thought, no edge to her. Negan was bored, disillusioned. He wanted more out of life. 

 

_ New car, new girl _

_ New ice, new glass _

 

He thought he was being stupid, after all, a harem is every man’s dream. A girl for every day of the week, never hearing argument, no emotion. It was the life, right? Negan had everything anyone else would want, he could have anything he wanted no matter what and no one could argue. 

 

It wasn’t enough.

 

_ New ice, new glass _

 

Despite all his desires being met, he wasn’t happy. He had all the booze in the world he could want. He ate like a fucking king and slept in a king bed with silk sheets. He received new shit each week. He had everything. It still wasn’t enough

 

Negan rose from his couch, moving to his private bathroom. He felt as if he was going through the motions, a boring routine. He contemplated this as he turned his shower on. Negan slowly melt the robe fall to the floor before immersing himself in the shower. He let out a low groan as the warm water drenched him.

 

_ She wash my back three times a day _

  
  


Negan thought to the other day, she was there. The woman vexing him, the one causing the doubt. Y/N was beautiful, she was intelligent, fuck, she was strong as hell. 

 

She was a newer Savior, his men found her traveling alone. Negan had given her two choices: die and they take her shit or join Sanctuary and they take her shit. He remembered how she laughed and made a sarcastic comment on how she  _ obviously _ wanted the first choice. Y/N choice the second choice, however, he had given her the option of becoming a wife. She had laughed in his face and said that only an idiot would choose that. Since then, he had wanted her.

 

The yearning for Y/N had only gotten worse as they had gone on runs with her. Her movements were as quick as her wit. The woman was strong, great with both a knife and a gun. He remembered how she took down three walkers alone with nothing but a combat knife. Negan was so hard that day, he had to have Sherry fix his blue balls. Hell, he even moaned out Y/N’s name that night. 

_   
_ _ This shower head feels so amazing _

 

Negan cursed, he was getting hard again. His hand moved to grasp his hardening cock, picturing you in his mind. He imagined you going down on him, your mouth enveloping him, while his hands pull your hair. You were so good, he thought, moaning your name. He would worship your body, he’d take his time learning what you enjoyed and what made you tick. Fuck, he’d do anything to get you. 

 

A pair of small hands interrupted his fantasy, causing him to release his cock. Amber giggled before beginning to rub soap onto his body and whispering a breathy, “Need help?” He allowed it, picturing your face as she washed him. 

 

_ We’ll both be high, the help don’t stare _ _   
_ _ They just walk by, they must don’t care _

 

Negan walked through Sanctuary, the residents kneeling before him. Sherry trailed behind him, he had a meeting with Dwight and he loved to fuck with his emotions. He made his way to Dwight’s room, noting how the residents didn’t dare look at him. They weren’t allowed to judge him, no one was.

 

_ A million one, a million two _ _   
_ _ A hundred more will never do _

 

He entered the room with Dwight.

 

“Dwight, we have a big fucking problem for tomorrow’s run,” Negan laughed, plopping down on Dwight’s couch.

 

“What’s the problem?” Dwight asked, suspiciously eyeing Negan.

“I was reading the fucking list that you made with your tiny ass brain and you left off one of the best god damn scavengers off of it,” Negan told him, Dwight  gave Negan a quizzical look. Negan let out a big, overdramatic sigh, “Do I have to fucking explain every fucking thing? You forgot Y/N.” His voice emphasized every word.

 

“She hasn’t had a day off in a week so I figure tha-” Dwight began before Negan interrupted him.

 

“Does it look like I give a flying fuck?” Negan asked. “Find her and tell her she is going, then tell her to get her ass to the meeting tonight since she’s going.”

 

At that, Negan stood and walked to the factory main floor, he had shit to do.

 

_ Super rich kids with nothing but loose ends _ _   
_ _ Super rich kids with nothing but fake friends _

 

Later, Negan stood  the rest of the Savior's, ready to go over the next day’s run. They were tackling an entire town and he needed everyone to be on the same page. He searched the crowd of men and women, searching for one woman in particular. His eyes finally found her, with Simon.

 

The pair were smiling and laughing together. Negan watched as she laughed at something Simon said and lightly hit him in the arm. His eyes darkened, this would not fucking fly. 

 

“Listen up motherfuckers,” Negan’s voice echoed, “tomorrow we have a big fucking day and I do not want any distractions.” His eyes met Simon’s in a silent warning and the smile the man held immediately fell. 

 

Negan grinned, he couldn’t trust anyone, not even his right hand. 

 

_ So all I got to do is whatever the fuck I want _

_ All we ever do is whatever the fuck we want _

 

The next morning, right before the crack of dawn, Negan walked to the front of Sanctuary. He was whistling, Lucille thrown over his shoulder. Today would be good, he just felt it. 

 

His grin fell when he saw you and Simon talking. He saw the admiration in your eyes and he felt disgusted. He had warned Simon. Negan came behind you two, eyes glancing at the paper, it was a strategy for Simon’s group which you had happened to be in. 

 

He spoke, causing you to jump before smiling at him, “There’s been a change of plans, dollface.”

 

“What’s that?” You asked, “Me and Simon had come up with a strategy for our group today.”

 

“You’re taking Dwight’s place in my group, you’ll drive me and help lead my group.”

 

You’re face barely held your shock, you were giddy. After all, you were climbing the ranks. You followed Negan to his truck before jumping in the old truck’s driver side. You looked at Negan and grinned, today was gonna be good.

 

_ Real love, I’m searching for a real love _

_ Oh, real love, I’m searching for a real love _

 

You thought the day would be good, however, the store your group had tackled had become overrun with walkers. You were fighting them left and right. Once one was dead, another would lunge out, attempting to tear into your flesh. 

 

Negan looked pissed, to say the least. His good day had been ruined. The walkers were almost overwhelming, almost. Lucille took out the dead quickly, despite his increasingly poor mood, he stayed alert. He looked at you from the corner of his eye, he knew you could handle yourself but watching you move gave him a high like no other.

 

A gut wrenching scream filled the air, distracting you. You looked to the source, one of your men had been taken down. Although you had seen this a million times before, you knew him. He had a little girl, who he provided for. She had already lost her mother months prior. Tears filled your eyes, but still you fought on, albeit sloppily. 

 

Negan noticed your fighting had begun slowing ever since that little bitch was eaten by the walkers. He saw one come up behind you as you knifed one in front of you. It was lunging at you and he could not let that happen. Lucille was brought down upon the fuckers head and you whipped around and looked at him, before quickly muttering out a quick “Thanks.”

 

A part of you swooned at Negan’s actions, so quick to save you, however, a more rational part swept it off. He was just doing his job, it was only logical he didn’t want more casualties since you had already lost one of your group in one run. You knew there was an attraction between you two, but you didn’t want just sex. If you did, you’d have given in by now. You wanted something real. Your mind raced nonetheless, even after you stabbed the last walker in the room.

 

You looked at the other men who survived the attack, there were originally five of you, including Negan, and of those, you had lost one. You looked to the two remaining Saviors before telling them to go scout the top floor of the building, leaving you and Negan alone on the floor.

“Hey Negan,” you called out, “Thank you for what you did earlier, for saving me.”

 

The man looked at you, “No fucking problem, I’ll accept your thanks physically too, babygirl.”

 

You merely laughed before shaking your head and returning to shoving cans of food into boxes, “Not a chance Negan, not a chance.”

 

Negan stood from his area of the store, leaving the cans of food behind him. He walked to your figure. His arms trapped you against the counter you leaned on, his body was flush against yours. Negan’s breath came out in hot puffs against your ear. You bit your lip in anticipation. The entire air of the situation changed, shifting from light hearted banter to something indescribable. 

 

He spoke, “Now, why don’t I have a chance, Y/N?”

 

“I don’t want to be another one of your wives, Negan. I don’t want to be used,” You shut your eyes, trying to savor the situation, no matter how short lived.

 

His hands moved to your hips before turning your body to him. You breaths came out in shallow pants, it felt harder to breathe around him. He was absolutely intoxicating. His right hand moved to your chin, forcing you to look into his eyes.

 

“You wouldn’t be a fucking wife, you could be more than that,” he whispered, “I like you ‘cause you’re smart and strong and independent.”

 

“Are you serious?” you asked, this wasn’t Negan. Negan wasn’t gentle and he definitely didn’t admit to his feelings. 

 

Rather than answering you, Negan’s mouth descended upon yours. Your lips moved in unison, bodies slowly melding together as he explored your mouth. The feeling was incredible, it somehow felt right to you. The man’s hands moved to your ass and pulled your hips towards him. Nothing could break you apart. 

 

Except the sound of the two men clamoring downstairs. You both immediately pulled away as Negan told you that you weren’t finished before he groped his growing bulge. Negan barked out orders to begin moving the rest of the boxes to the trucks, it was time to go.

 

As you drove back to the camp, Negan squeezed your leg, a grin on his face. He couldn’t wait 'til he got home.

 

_ Real love, ain't that something rare _

_ I’m searching for a real love, talking ‘about real love _

 


	2. I've Given Up On You-Rick Grimes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: I've Given Up On You by Real Friends

_ You used to make me feel like I could walk on water _

_ Now most nights I'm just sinking down and down _

 

You didn’t know where you had lost him. You had been his confidant, someone who always had his back. Somewhere, between the fall of  the prison and your arrival at Alexandria, the lines that established your relationship became blurred and in the uncertainty, someone else had captured his heart.

You loved Rick, Rick didn’t love you. It was a cliche found in a million love stories. During your stay with the group, you had developed feelings for him. You never left his side, hoping to become a permanent fixture in his life. You had even shared a kiss with him, in the middle of the night. 

You hadn’t been able to sleep, choosing to wander the prison instead. You had stumbled upon Rick, sitting outside, gazing at the starlit sky. It was a brief kiss, innocent and chaste. He had insisted it was a mistake, that he didn’t mean to. He apologized for leading you on while you shook your head, saying that it meant nothing to you. Rick had gone on to say he didn’t want to risk a relationship in the apocalypse. You solemnly agreed.

That night, you cried yourself to sleep, heartbroken.

 

_ I write songs about you all the time _

_ I bet I don't run through your mind _

 

It had been a while since your brief stint with the man. Now you lived in the safety of Alexandria, preoccupying yourself with any activity possible to avoid Rick. Sometimes you passed him on the street, he barely paid attention to you outside of the curt “hellos” he gave. It hurt.

You became a stranger in his life, watching from the outside made the pain duller. Everyday you saw the traits that caused you to fall in love with him. Everyday you felt your heartbreak in another way. It wasn’t easy, watching from the sidelines when he had once been so prominent in your life. 

 

_ I've given up on you, but it still hurts to know you're not alone _

_ Don't worry, I'll keep out of your life and stay awake at night _

 

You knew he didn’t want you in his life, you knew he didn’t want your love. As much as it hurt, you knew you couldn’t take it personally. After all, the potential heartbreak of losing a loved one scared him just as much as it did you. The risk was too great. 

So, when you caught wind of his relationship with Michonne, your heart shattered. His words from the prison echoed around in your head. It was maddening. You could see how he looked at her, the love and admiration in his eyes were obvious. It mirrored the way you looked at him and how someone else looked at you.

 

_ It's 4am and you're keeping me from closing these sleepy eyes _

_ Does the thought of me keep you up at night? _

 

That night, you realized, he didn’t care about you. Thoughts of him plagued your mind, latching onto every pleasant memory, planting seeds of self doubt. How could you have been so stupid, you thought. You sat on your front porch step, your hands muffling your soft cries. You couldn’t sleep knowing that the man you loved, would never feel the same.

You felt silly, the dead rose from the Earth and your worried if the man liked you or not. Yo wondered if he ever thought of you. Did he ever contemplate what could have been if he chose you? Did he ever want you? Even lust for you? Did your presence once pain him like his did yours? These questions raged on in your mind.

 

_ I've given up on you, and my skin, and my bones _

 

It wasn’t worth it, you thought. The pain and longing was a vicious cycle, every night was the same. 

However, your bout of self pity was briefly interrupted as a voice spoke up, “What’s wrong with you?”

You looked up, eyes red and dull. There Daryl stood, signature glare in place. You shared a home with him, after all. Waving a hand at him, you shook your head, “Nothing, I’m just being stupid.”

The grass under Daryl’s feet crunched as he made his way towards the porch before he plopped himself down next to you. He slowly moved his arm around your shoulder pulling you towards him. At the contact you cried harder, hand moving up to clutch his vest in your hands. 

Daryl knew how you felt about Rick. It was painfully obvious to everyone in the group, however, he was jealous. To him, you were perfect, you didn’t whine about the circumstances, you didn’t dwell on the time before the apocalypse, you just moved forward and did anything to help the group.

His other arm snaked around your body, pulling you tighter to his chest. He wasn’t going to give up on you. 

  
  
  



	3. Song for a Guilty Sadist - Eugene x Reader x Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Smut, cheating, angst

_ This makes me feel like a weak man who thinks that he is strong. _

_ Must I play the chauvinist to be the man you want? _

 

He grunted above you, hot air coming out of his mouth in short puffs against your neck. His cock sliding into you in a languid, calm pace. It was typical, you thought. You let out a fake moan, almost wishing it was over. 

Eugene was a kind-hearted man, you would never disagree with that. He had been there for you when you lost your brother, the last living relative you had left. Over time, you two had grown close, both in mind and body. However, you felt both of those bonds fading away, finding that they were only made out of convenience.

 

_ Sweaty fingers push down on your throat, you say you like it rough, _

_ but it's hard to think I do this out of love _

 

To put it simply, you were bored. Bored of him, bored of pretending to be in love and bored of sex with him. You loved sex rough and dirty, you wanted to be choked and spanked. Eugene didn’t like that, he was a man of simple pleasures and could suffice without the extras. He felt guilty if he were to do any of that.

Tonight was the same, your face down in the mattress while his length slid into you in the same repetitive motions. He groaned, his end coming near while yours was miles away. It certainly wasn’t a lack of communication, in the throes of your pleasure you had expressed your wants and desires.

 

_ And from my own submissive pleasure I want to do just as you wish, _

_ but I slap your face too lightly when you ask me to make fists. _

 

His hands were firmly planted at your hips, not hard enough to leave impressions. Breathlessly, you moaned, “Slap my ass, baby.” He nodded, sweat pouring down his forehead, dripping down his face. Eugene’s hand came down on your rear, you groaned, it wasn’t enough. “Again!” His hand came down again, with even less force from before.  You let out a strangled cry, easily mistaken for pleasure. It was bred from disappointment. A few thrusts later, he groaned, hips stilling he came into you. 

 

_ Kiss me softly do not bite, we can explore like naughty kids. _

 

Pulling out, he leaned against the headboard as you turned to lay in your spot on the bed. Eugene settled for bed, pulling the covers over both of you. He gave a soft smile before kissing you, slowly. The kiss lacked something. The spark had faded. You pulled away, facing the window and shutting your eyes. 

Briefly, you wondered if you were selfish. After all, he was intelligent, kind, and in love with you. You were too much of a coward to tell him the truth. Eugene didn’t deserve this, you thought, he deserved a girl who would love and appreciate him. Obviously, you couldn’t do that.

The last thing you heard before you fell asleep was his voice saying, “I love you.”

 

_ You say you're bored, want dominating, and I just stare and flinch. _

 

The next morning, you found yourself alone in your bedroom. He always gets up first, it was okay with you. You knew you had to have the conversation to end it soon. You disliked conflict ironic considering your day’s plans. You sat up and began getting ready for the day.

On the other side of camp, Eugene sat in a toolshed, working on a radio for Alexandria. His mind flitted to you, he put his head in his hands, fingertips rubbing his temples. He knew where you were going, who you were going with. Each week was the same, you and him would have sex, only to go out the next day to make love in the forest to  _ him _ . The man that he could never be.

 

_ How rude of me to bring my thoughts into your bedroom. _

_ Is it condescending to be so scared I might hurt you _

 

He never brought it up, figuring that if you were getting your release elsewhere you’d stay with him. So, he felt it better that the secret was better buried beneath the surface. Anything to try to preserve you in his life. Though it was killing him. Each day he saw the looks you gave him, full of love and admiration. You were in love, just not with him. 

Sighing, he stood up, he had gate duty after all. Relieving Sasha from her post, he stood in his chair beneath the shade of the fence. Usually you left before his watch and came back afterwards. Today was different. 

You smiled as you saw Eugene, running over to give him a quick hug before explaining what you were doing for the day. Eugene’s eyes briefly flickered to your companion, a spark of jealousy struck him for a moment. Why couldn’t Eugene be more rough, rugged? How did he lose you?

“Daryl and I are going on a supply run, we should be back in a few hours.”

Daryl got on his bike, waiting for the gate to be opened, you jumped on behind him, hands going behind you to hold on. As you two sped away, Eugene saw how your hands shifted to wrap around his chest. The small movement held a million words left unspoken.

Eugene had lost you and there was no coming back from it.


End file.
